Book Of Likes Faces

Some will say that you haven't lived unless you've attended at least one huge rave party. Well, my first and only warehouse type rave was Paradox in Bmore where my best friend was a DJ, I went right before they had closed down. I’m glad I got to live a life of some sort lol

First, I want to thank all of you for your prayers, good vibes, and well wishes as I visited my colo-rectal surgeon, Dr. Steven Hunt today. I wanted to give you an update on what I know at this time. Unfortunately, I did not receive the good news I was hoping for today. The tumor growing in my colo-rectal area is much larger than I have previously known or been told. It is so large at this point that it has involved almost all of the colo-rectal region. My bladder is smashed almost completely flat and the tumor is creating enormous pressure on my bowel and rectal wall, which is why I've been suffering so much pain and having trouble going to the bathroom. Due to inconclusive biopsies, another biopsy will have to be taken to determine if the tumor is malignant. Unfortunately, whether the tumor is benign or malignant, the doctors have no way of removing it without removing much of the colo-rectal area, including the rectum. That will probably mean a series of surgeries that will include both the removal of the recturm, and reconstructive surgery so that I can continue with normal life. The next step is the final MRI before surgery, next Tuesday. Then surgery will be scheduled. The surgery and removal is non-negotiable if this pain is going to stop. It is going to be a big and painful surgery, but I have faced them before. That is all I know for now, and all I feel like talking about for tonight. I appreciate everyone's love and prayers, but this is very frightening to me, and I need time to wrap my mind around it. I thank all of you for your love.

There is no sun that does not emit the rays of sunshine. The two are inseparable, and wherever the sun shines there will be light. Whatever you call that Force, that Spirit, or that Consciousness. You are that. You are the rays of its Light, a being of its Being, a manifested vibration of its unmanifested Nature. When the storms in life arise, you must remember the sun your divinity and not identify with the darkness of difficulties. You are not suffering, you have only forgotten who you are and what you are, and have identified with the changes of this world. But you are the changeless, immutable, ever blissful, ever existing, light of the soul. The Sun of that great light is within you, and you are the sunshine.

You know what I think it's time for me to get my mother out of Coney island it became such a death trap it's sad how we all grew up in a neighborhood together whether we know each other like that or not for this to feel like your not safe anywhere too many heads from Coney are dropping like flies this is so sad so terrible so disgusting anyone who's living in Coney now I ask God to please protect you please be safe please be aware of your surroundings too much evilness in this world.

I already started last Saturday looking for a house to rent and sign up an agreement for contract for deed. I think that contract for deed homes are much more easy to buy and stay away from bank financing high interest rates long time bills to pay. I'm planning to pay 1500 dollars a month and sign the agreement for 2,000 dollars, that will leave 500$ to own the home. My deal is a contract for deed between family members.

I wish I could tell you something but I don't know how. When I try and tell you something it feels like I am stretching beyond limit and leaning over the edge of a wishing well and trying to scoop up the right things to say to you, but when there is an endless number of wrong things piled up on top of it, then the impossibility lingers as I continue falling into this deep narrow and lonely well—I am surprised I have not drowned yet!