Book Of Likes Faces

I'm a bit hurt . My ex recently wanted to reconnect as friends and after setting certain boundaries, we have been getting on well. After 2 and a half years together we obviously still had chemistry and were getting on and the topic of what even happened to cause the end of it came up. One moment that came up was we were at a gig of a band she wanted to see and all her friends that I hadn't yet met were there and we met up for pre drinks for about 4 hours before the show, bearing in mind I don't drink and everyone was very rowdy so I sat quietly not knowing what to say. Then for the show we were right at the front at the barrier and I felt very claustrophobic and my senses went into meltdown but I held it together. After the show they all wanted to stay out then go clubbing but by that point I had absolutely no social battery left, not a chance I could mask any longer and they started smoking which makes me struggle to breathe and panic. I took myself to one side and instead of having a loud meltdown, I had a quiet one just to recharge a bit. Things were tense on the way home and we broke up a week later. I only found out tonight that the while time they all thought I was weird and was being rude and dismissive and when asked what was wrong, she admitted to telling everyone I was just having a tantrum. I feel betrayed, after two and a half years she should have empathised a bit more. To cut a long story short, they wanted a normal night out and I couldn't handle it and was therefore ridiculed. I don't know if it's an overreaction to cut her off again as this happened 6 months ago but I feel betrayed more than anything and it hurts that the person I trusted more than anyone didn't have my back to look popular and funny in front of their friends. Sorry for the essay, you don't have to read it but just needed somewhere to vent.

The Book Of Likes poem by poet Heather Sweeney that I can personally relate to being an urbexer: 'Home is people's souls. It's not a place. If you go back to a place after souls are gone, then all you see is an empty space. Home is where your heart is, more than where you lay your head. Home is not a place, it's a feeling, a state of mind, not a bed. Earth is our temporary home. Every home is one of a kind. A house is shelter, but a home is love and not a smelter.'

Home is people's home. It isn't a place. If you go back to a place after souls are gone then all you see is an empty place. Home is where your heart is, more-so
than where you lay your head. Home is not a place, it's a feeling and a state of mind, not a bed. Earth is our temporary home. Every home is one of a kind. A house is a shelter. A home is love, not a smelter. It is not a where but a what and who. God Loves You.